a place for my writing desire..

Ini adalah satu dari sekian banyak failed English fanfc gw, gw udah tulis beberapa chater, tapi terhalang keterbatasan bahasa Inggris gw. Gw bakal post semua chapter yang udah gw tulis dalam bahasa Inggris, dan kalau ada yang baca (comment) , gw bakal terusin fanfic ini dalam bahasa Indonesia. ^^ Enjoy!!

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“Hyung, do you want me to make a tuna cake for breakfast tomorrow hyung? I’ll make it special..” Seungri hasn’t give up pursuing his hyung to share the contact of Go Hana, or the suspect Go Hana.

“No,,” Jiyong firmly answer his dongsaeng while he typed ‘Go Hana’ on his university website page, curiosity kills a cat. True, Jiyong was so curios about this girl, somehow his player sense told him to search further information about this girl, she wouldn’t be ugly if she was that famous, but why she dressed like ugly betty and asked him to break her heart? At the lunch time, in front of loads of people, she really must be something.

“Make me one maknae, and make sure that special isn’t synonym of experimental” Seunghyun called out from the TV lounge. Once upon a time Seungri made a breakfast for all 5 of them, of course the menu is his infamous tuna cake, and the day ended up with Seunghyun, Youngbae, and Daesung spent a night in emergency due the diarrhea they suffered, Seungri put a special ingredient that called fermented lemon vinegar, a perfect disaster for the were dieting people.

“I’m not offering you Seunghyun Hyung!” Seungri hissed, “Just call me if there is something I can help hyung!” with that he join Seunghyun in TV lounge, bickering about the past incident, that it was never be Seungri’s fault coz he told everyone that he add fermented lemon vinegar and in other way it was his hyungs’ own fault with kept eating the tuna cake. While in Seunghyun’s perspective, Seungri is the main culprit because no one except him in the apartment knew what the hell fermented lemon vinegar was.

Jiyong sighed in defeat when his computer showed him the same result over and over again, “No Result to Display”.

“Hyung look at what I found!” Daesung barged in, Jiyong’s body jolted in surprise. Deasung shove a piece of paper with various face printed on it.

“What’s these?” Jiyong asked his eyes observing the paper in his hand. There, printed several angle of someone’s face, but none of them are clear, either because the pictures not focused, the person in the picture wore a rather heavy make up, ot the 2 of them put together.

“That’s the Go Hana we talked about yesterday, she was the main actress for several acts and musical at our university, she’s in her second semester but she’s already gained a lot of popularity due her natural yet emotional acting, I heard she once again become the main actress for the next musical” Daesung explain everything that he just know to his hyung.

Jiyong nodded, how come this girl have no minihompy, msn, facebook, or what ever it is that both daum and google couldn’t find her, not even in their university’s website.

“it’s not even clear Daesung ah, I cant really see her face..” Jiyong rubbed his eyes.

“Hyung, this was my best, I cant find her via daum nor google, she is mysterious, I can tell you hyung..”

“Yeah..thanks anyway.” Jiyong paused, “Daesung ah,why do I felt so anxious about this girl?” He trailed his voice. Is it because this ugly betty ask him to break her heart straight forwardly? No one in this world would like someone break their heart, rite?

“Don’t say that our play.ass will finally settling down, I just can imagine that hyung!” Daesung shrugged at his hyung. As long he knows Jiyong, never in Jiyong’s live he settled with only one girl, even if he was, that would never past 10 days anniversary.

The older one just scoffed, giving his dongsaeng his smirk, “You know me Daesung ah.. girls are just..”

“Pieces of clothes, yeah I know hyung..” Daesung cut his hyung off, “but who knows this Go Hana girl is just, your stop..”

===

A week before

“I called for break!!” Romeo swayed his hands to the crowding students of his. “Which part you didn’t understand Go Hana??!” he shouted in frustration to his main actress. The one who shouted kept her head low, didn’t know how to proceed.

“I told you, feel the love~ breath it~ suck it~ chew it~ rub it all over your body~” Romeo kept his voice one tone higher.

“Jagiya, don’t be so harsh to this poor kid..” seved by the bell, Juli called for Romeo sweetly.

Romeo sighed in defeat, never in his live directing a love story could be this hard. He even auditioning for the actress and actors, It took about a week of observation before he finally announced the result. He pinched his temple, turned his body and heading towards the exit, he landed a light kiss on Juli’s forehead before actually exited the theater.

Juli pat Hana’s shoulder for courage “Are you okay. Honey?” Hana gave him a smile. Or her. Juli is a transgender female, it’s already her second year of being a woman, also her 4^th year dating romeo, yes they were gay couple back then.

“It’s so frustrating unnie, I was all out and yet Romeo sonsaengnim still yelled at me, I don’t even know where I lack about..” Hana sighed, she ran her fingers through her silky hair.

True, she always all out. She drain all her tears, in her previous act in a tragedy musical, she screamed out her lungs of anger when she played as a victim of under-age rape that brutally took a revenge, she laugh her heart out every time she has to, even for a bitter laugh. Everyone has acknowledged her blessed talent, but this one is a little different.

“I gave you an advice, what made you so angry when you played as an under-age rape victim?”

“I was.. I felt like all the possible future taken from my grips forcefully, I felt no one’s support me, I felt like..”

“You were Mary?” Juli cut her, mentioning the name of the character Hana was played.

Hana nodded like a little kid, “You will be a great actress hana, believe me..” with that Juli blew her whistle, signaling all the actor and actress to gather along for emotion sorting.

“Sit in a circle, come on, hurry!!! We don’t hav a lot of time!!” Juli instruct them. Everyone followed her order, sitting crossed leg, yoga like in the circle. While Hana still pondering what Juli told her earlier, what exactly she wanted to tell?

Juli began to cast her spell.

“let your eyes focused to one, and only one dot in front of you, keep the focused until everything other than your dot fading away, leaving only you and you dot. Your eyes eventually becoming heavier and heavier as your dot come closer to embrace you in the name of peaceful mind..”

Inhale

Exhale

Inhale

[Eyes closed]

Exhale

Inhale

Exhale

“you’re now totally relax, pitch darkness surrounding you, you are nowhere. In the middle of your questioning mind, you could see a ray of light, a ray of hopes, a ray of something that you believe you have to follow..you follow the ray just to a hut, you open the door just to find nothing but a big empty jar, there you can read a label ‘Musical’ ”

Hana felt a tap in her shoulder urging her to open her eyes, just to find Romeo looked back at her. She glanced over Juli who made an agreement nod signaling her to followed Romeo, outside the theater.

“Look Hana, you might listen this too often...” Romeo started a conversation once they were out, “you’re special.”

Hana didn’t know to respond, it felt different when you heard that kind of compliment straight from you respective mentor.

“Thanks?” Hana said shyly.

“No, bunny, no thanks are accepted. I watched a lot of people made their way to stardome after they step out this building over here, you name them, great actors and actresses of our country..”

Hana nodded thoughtfully, “They are now is the result of all the s.hit you haven’t even know how to spell it” Hana looked at the mentor quizzically, what is this man tried to imply?

“they have to went through loads of auditioning, loads of harsh basic trainings, loads of rejection, just loads enough to make you want to gave up.. but you haven’t experience that, did you?“

“I.. sonsaengnim, i..” Hana falteringly gave a respond.

“What I want to tell you that.. you’re going to be the next torch holder Hana, I knew it, I knew it since day one I read your resume, do you remember what did you write?”

“Not particularly..” Hana shook hear head quietly.

“When everyone wanted to be a movie star, you wrote that you want to be a drama theater queen, who could act and take whatever it is to act. Never in my career, I see a determined youngster like you, most of them pursuing famous, and only famous, but you..” Romeo put both of his hands on Hana’s shoulders, “all you want is ACT, play a character..”

“Yes, I am..”

“And I know you just need a little step to fulfilled that..”

“I don’t..”

“There will be a lot of sunbaes there Hana, Park Kan Sung, Jang iL Nam, Goh Sang Wa, and a lot more drama theater veteran.. who will watch over you guys and pick a lucky one to be his or her protégé, a clear pathway to achieve your dream..”

Hana’s eyes widened hearing those holy names Romeo mentioned, they were a great theater actors and actress, her idols.

“That’s why I have held the audition; I don’t want to disappoint my own mentor, Noh Cha Rang”

Hana’s jaw dropped, Noh Cha Rang? The famous Noh Cha Rang? Noh Cha Rang is the best actor in this country history of acts and musical, he could put a lot emotion inside him and his act like he wasn’t act at all, and the velocity of his changing emotion, was just..a flash. He could cried like he just want to die but in a speed of a blink of eyes, he laughed out loud over his dead wife body and said that everything was jus a joke in his Musical ‘Eternity’. Or when he acted as a cold hearted assassin who had to kill his own wife that turned out to be his next target after killed a big boss in mafia world, in ‘Lovers bullet’.

“Noh..Cha..Rang??” Hana felt starstruck.

“That’s why you have to do this rite Hana, all I can do is drill you to meet his expectation, and mine too..”

“I don’t really know how to respond this Romeo Sunsaengnim.. i.. I.. Noh Cha Rang?? I..he is..” once again Hana faltering her words.

“I know, your biggest idol..” Romeo tapped her crown, “so, one hour after rehearsal?”

Hana nodded frantically, “I WOULD LOVE TO!”

So that’s that. After this little mentor-student conversation Hana will receive a personal acting drill from the oh-so-great-Noh Cha Rang’s protégé, for an hour after each rehearsal which is every day.

True, everything was exhausting, but this determined youngster never complain, not even a sigh, she does every thing her mentor would ask her to do to improve her acting skill, speaking of which above the other actress.

It was the fifth day of Hana’s private acting drill with Romeo when once again she got yelled by him.

“GO HANA!! This emotion is the emotion we need for the climax for pete’s sake!! Why couldn’t you fill your self with that?!!” the girl shrunk in her own resentment, her eyes wet.

“OH MY GOD GO HANA!” Romeo stomped his step with frustration out side, while his love, Juli sent an apologize look as she walked closer to Hana.

“He didn’t mean that, he’s just frustrated over his very first musical that he wrote himself…” Juli patted Hana’s crown. Little she realized her words just deepened Hana’s resentment.

“I’m the worst actress ever unnie, I didn’t even deserve to call my self an actress to begin with..” Hana’s voice faded, her sobs began to distinct.

“No, no, no honey…” Juli tuck Hana’s hair behind her ears, “Just because you couldn’t show the perfect vibe and feel for one tiny emotion, doesn’t mean that you’re not a good actress…”

“But that emotion we talked about is the climax, and what kind of actress couldn’t capture the right vibe for the climax?” Juli was only smiling.

“do you remember what I told you about a week ago?”

“not particularly..” Hana still sobbed, but she managed to answer her co-mentor while her mind travelled to her memory.

“You said you felt that you were Mary..” Hana finally pinpoint her co-mentor, she nodded slowly.

Juli smiled, “you cried, you yelled, you let out your anger, do you know why did you can act that way back then?”

“coz I stand in Mary’s shoes..?”

Once again Juli smiled, “aside from that?”

“… I.. had a great scenario which describe every emotion clearly..? ”

“Not that honey, every scenario is just the same..” Hana looked her co-mentor quizzically, “because you have ever felt all the emotion, you have ever cried, you have ever yelled, you have ever mad… they came out naturally because you know exactly how they were felt… ”

Hana pondered her co-mentor, she is right. The most important aspect of acting is never act, make your self angry when you have to act angry, make yourself sad when you have to cry, etc.

“I assume that you ever been in love, do you?” Juli asked her teasingly, Hana’s face turned pinkish, “Well, Ji Eun was in one..” Juli mentioned Hana’s character.

“It’s weird.. you gave me a blow down to my spine for your broken heart phase in this acts, but you haven’t fall in love yet, how come a person felt broken hearted when he never felt Love?”

Hana taken a back with Juli’s question, but not for a long moment, she managed to compose her self quicly, “Easy, I read broken hearted people’s blog.. some of them was so emotional unnie.. and I did th..” Juli gave her a weird look, Hana did an online research to know the vibe of emotions?

“online research wont work for Love honey..” Juli cut Hana off, “You can’t capture the perfect vibe of love coz you never in it, and love is the most complicated feeling you cant autodidact your self. Not even with online research, I bet you’ve been rummaged other people’s blogs with “LOVE” keyword..” Hana’s face now turns Redish, how can her co-mentor know? Is she a phychic?

“Find your self a boyfriend; I can see you have a lot of stalkers, who’s that man from music department, Bebby, Tabby??” Juli plastered her face with mischievous grin.

======

“Pieces of clothes, yeah I know hyung..” Daesung cut his hyung off, “but who knows this Go Hana girl is just, your stop..” he add a flirty eyes bathing to tease the older.

“Stop, yeaaahh.. if you mean stick with only one girl is a stop, well hell no..” Jiyong shrugged his shoulders in fear, “I think it is a perfect time to call the master..”

“huh, who??” Daesung asked his hyung in front of him.

Jiyong gave Daesung a sly smirk, “uri bunny Teddy hyung” with that Jiyong flipped his phone open, and punched several numbers.

Jiyong placed his phone to his left ear, waiting for the other line, his brows furrowed when the other line seemed no where to be picked.

“Hyung didn’t answer it..” Jiyong said to Daesung, Daesung pouted his lips acknowledge him.

“There’s only one place where you could find Teddy hyung when he doesn’t pick a call at this hour” Jiyong glance over the wall clock which showed him the current time 01.22 AM.

“YG Club..” Jiyong and Daesung exclaimed together.